My First Attempt at Fiction (content advisory: 🌶🔥♨️)

TEXTVERSATION

I doubt you’re ever going to meet anyone else like me throughout the entire rest of your life. I’m simply stating a fact. If I could give you some advice, it would be to take whatever I’m offering whenever I’m offering it, because you won’t be getting anything like it ever again.

What is it like?

See, now you’ve gone and blown your chance so you’ll never know. Big unfortunately for you.

I doubt that but if you say so. I’m over here rock hard just imagining what you were going to say. I guess ill have to handle this problem again.

I guess you will. I was going to tell you about my waxing appointment, the post-waxing maintenance, and the “special feature” I opted for. But now I’m not.

What features?

Take your own matters into your own damn hands.

As you wish.

Lagoon again. No conversation. You have a technique for weaseling out of emotional intimacy of any kind. I actually expected the OPPOSITE from you. Then again, based on your online dating profile, I mistakenly thought you were 15 years OLDER than you actually are (lie much?) until two weeks ago. Which pretty much explains the last 2 weeks.

That plus you don’t hurt good enough yet, inside or out. Call me if you ever do.

[Professional Writers: I think I’ve managed to capture the male’s essence, but I REALLY, REALLY need know if the female character sounds like Amber Heard!!]

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