THE POO WHO IS YOU
Amoral
Black-hearted
Conniving
Diabolical
Evil
Fiendish
Grievous
Heartless
Insidious
Janus-faced
Killing
Luciferic
Maleficent
Nefarious
Odious
Perfidious
Quelling
Ruthless
Sadistic
Treacherous
Ugly
Villainous
Wicked
X-tinguishing
Yucky
Zest-Arresting

HOW I WAS WITH YOU (MORE “POOH” THAN POO)
Adoring
Beauty-Blind & Beauty-Full
Compassionate, Caring
Devoted (Even When Demoted)
Empathetic (To Your Pathetic)
Forgiving (Your Many Sins)
Generous and Genuine
Horny (For a Horned Beast 🤦🏼‍♀️)
Inspiring (Of Desiring)
Just Joyously Jennifer
Kind, Kindly, Kissable
Loving, Lasting, Lusting
Marriage Material (😱)
Noble (You: Trouble)
Open and Honest (You: OPPOSITE)
Passionate
Qualm-free (You: Qualms for Me)
Romantic (You: Romance’s Rust)
Smitten (A Bitten & Smitten Kitten)
Trusting (To Your Trust-Busting)
Uplifting (You: Downshifting)
Validating (You: Incessant Waiting)
Welcoming, Warm, & Wonderful
X-cellent, X-ceptional (You: X Out)
Yummy To Your Scummy
Zealous (You: Not Even Jealous)

ROBBIN MY MONEY AND STEALIN’ MY HONEY

Sorry for the whinging.
I’m weary of this upending.
I’m always heading to the dastardly
Deed of ending for me
The darkness and heartless
Future I’m portending,
Due to your lies and pretending,
Disguised as a guise
Of protective “fire-tending.”
When life got very hot,
I saw you lovingly lending
Me a delivering hand,
But you’re not a valorous man.

Too cowardly are you,
You useless mound of Poo,
Because of all that YOU
Subjected ME to!
I don’t know the Why,
I only know that I
Can barely flap or fly,
No longer seek the sky,
And always want to die.

It also blows to also know
I’ve written at least a million
Thrillin,’ spillin’ words to explain
The many killin’ evil ways
You, a heartless villain,
Infected me with so much pain.
The thought of my inanity
Provokes my latent insanity,
And makes it so much worse.

My life is newly cursed,
So better call a hearse
For I cannot rehearse
The ways you’ve made me worse;
There’s simply too much hurt.
You hoarded and disbursed.
You never put me first,
Just made me feel my worst.
So I shall use this verse
To decry you as perverse,
And to demand a swift remand
Until I’m wholly reimbursed.

Not that any sum of funds
Could possibly be won
To compensate me
For the things you’ve done
And the insensate ways
You bled me for days.
The only release or
Source of peace,
At least for me,
Is for your stealth
To steal your health,
And cause your death!

Sadly, all kindness has now left,
So forgive me, I’m bereft;
Can’t care ‘bout other selves,
Especially the selfish self
Who shelled me until felled,
Then shipped me off to hell
Where I no longer know myself
And only want to off myself.

This world would be a better place
If I maintain my life and grace;
We can then dis-grace YOUR face,
Put you in YOUR place,
And Off YOUR head instead!