2 X 2: ARK GUEST LIST

I LOVE THIS LIST I COMPILED IN 2017 ENOUGH TO SHARE IT

Lupine (wolf-like)
Canine (dog-like)
Feline (cat-like)
Porcine (pig-like)
Ovine (sheep-like)
Taurine (bull-like)
Limacine (slug-like)
Piscine
Elephantine
Equine
Muscine, Murine (mouse-like)
Serpentine
Aquiline (of or like an eagle)
Bovine (cow-like)
Vulpine (foxlike)
Leporine (rabbit- or hare-like)
Cervine (deer-like; moose, elk)
Avine (birdlike, but rare; Avian)
Squalene (like a shark; big fish)
Tigrine (tiger)
Delphine (dolphin-like)
Cameline
Ursine (bear-like)

INTENDED AUDIENCE


INTENDED AUDIENCE

I tag “writing” and “writers” on most of my posts, but I don’t write FOR writers.

I merely write to show off for a hopefully well-read, well-explored, literate audience.

The most self indulgent activity


The most self-indulgent activity

It’s surely writing;
You spend half your time focused on your thought process and the other half processing the varied ways to communicate your thoughts.

Either way, you can’t get out of your head.

P.S. How does any writer find the mental energy to be an extrovert? At least full-time?

WEDNESDAY WRITING WREFLECTIONS

If you’re advocating I ditch my entire wardrobe in favor of a BRAND NEW WARDROBE, I won’t require much convincing. Shall we charge your credit card?

THE NUANCE OF A GOOD OUTFIT
SHOULD I LEAVE THE HOUSE SOUNDING RIDICULOUS
LOOKING NAIVE IS THE LOOK I SHALL CONCLUDE WITH

My Co-Dependency


MY CO-DEPENDENCY

Sometimes I hide behind my poems and stories.
Other times, I use them like a diary.
It depends on how I feel about myself at the time.

It scares me how much I depend on them.
What will I do when they leave?


[For some reason, this one cost me something to admit, as well as a few tears on its exit].

The Freedom to Write

The Freedom to Write

“Freedom” to ME is the opportunity to track down every thought which captures my fancy,
Full-time and Virtually,
Wherever and whenever I want.
At least for a tiny while.

I plan to live it up and break lots of rules!

FOR THE “PURE WRITERS:” Why I Happen to Like My Pure Videos

Why I like My Snapchat Videos:
They Showcase a Lifetime of Experience

According to my acquired belief system, these videos possess many virtues and capitalize on a Lifetime’s Wealth of Experience.

Their virtue begins prior to my birth with The Invention of The Photograph and the Resultant Cliché that “A picture speaks a thousand words.”

They’re able to make beauty from the ashes of my many Wasted Years as a Wife AND in Chemistry and Algebra to Fail to Recognize a formula for success, even if it equates!

Regardless of my track record, I feel in my gut these videos marry the Dramatic Flair I FIRST began at the onset of puberty with my Ability to Phrase My Words Poetically…

Honed during my years as a writer to Think Poetically In The First Place!

The end result should be POTENT DRAMA, wryly age-fermented into one self-effacing, surprisingly-impactful, socially-irresponsible yet hopefully still-entertaining multimedia of a cyberbyte.

When that inevitably fails like all my prior marriages, I find myself paying a premium to My IPhone Memory Plan and resorting to my inherent Gift of Gab, videotaping 100% of Everything I blab about for hours. I then rely on my Natural Aesthetic to Recognize The 1% that’s salvageable and ultimately return to my aptly-titled B.S. degree in Radio-TV-Film to Edit The Useless Footage Down, hopefully quasi-coherently.

Of course, I never forget to swing by my long-term, prestigious highschool-memory banks to Cleverly Spin and Repackage this mere fraction of useless chatter about Everything into “Much Ado About Nothing.”

I hope you find them entertaining, too. Frankly, they’re easier to make than the poems, and I’d appreciate the harmless self-promotion.

CREATIVE LITTER

CREATIVE LITTER

I have to blow through
A lot of fuses, and
Refuse a lot, too,
Burning through
Lots of refuse,
Blowing, burning,
And refusing through
That, too,
Then re-selecting, reworking,
And re-tooling
Even previously-refused
Piled-high refuse,
Re-tooling THAT and
Refusing It YET again,
Hoping to eventually
End up with
Any Old Garbage
I can first refuse
Then, ultimately,
If I’m very lucky,
Dumpster Dive
And pick over
A whole landfill of
Scraps Spaghetti Confetti
To discover a tiny little bit
Of infinitesimal filthy dirt,
Soiled then Re-Spoiled
Enough to actually
Be of Any Use.

It’s either that or throw it on
The Giant Heap of Rotting Trash
And let it decompost naturally.


[PS. Where do you think
I found YOU?]

YouTrue Crime Poetry, Exhibit 41

Guilty of showing off my quick digestion skills again…

A CAUTIONARY TALE: DON’T MARRY ASSHOLES IN DISGUISE

(They have some convincing costumes,
so please don’t start “Poet-Blaming”
for “Victim-Shaming”;
I wrote a poem to honor her,
Which honors more than empty words)

I’m so sorry The Freshest Rosie
Was Bound and Married into a useless posey,
But because she poked so slowly,
She identified her murderer,
And indexed Death’s
Most Pointed Finger
At Her useless excuse of
A lame-ass husband;
He poisoned her with cyanide
And never cared about
The Cars Nearby,
Driving on Ways both
Motored and High.

He might’ve been a Husband, true,
But in my always-humble opinion,
Yazeed’s Phylum is more
Rat than Human.
This isn’t fact nor scarcely truth,
Though I’ll be glad to school
Anyone with less than
Half a clue.
My lessons are so free,
You’ll think they’re a
Dream-come-true.
In fact versus fiction
(Yes, I’m aware of the
Inherent contradiction),
I can only offer a special
Priced at so low a Price
And at CooCoo Crazy Costs
Because I actually talk This Way.
Oh, how it drives me so insane!
But what can I do?
And what can I say?
It Always comes out Rhyming
Any and Either way,
Every nano-momentary passing
Of Every Single Day.

Which Antidote might you advise
To under-dose Demise-by-Rhyme?

THE SONG OF POLITICS IN THE AIR

THE SONG OF POLITICS IN THE AIR

I thought jokes were only ever
Thought, Written, Told, or Spoken
By an Individual-Sized Person,
One accountable for its own voice.

However, Politicians have taught us
We don’t have to Make A Choice!
All of these things can occur in unison,
As well as simultaneously,
More “cacophonous” than “sonorous” or “harmonious”,
If You ask Me, or
According to the Notes I read.
I don’t know,
YOU tell ME:
Do they also sound
Too Stale to Sail
From YOUR Slide on
This Slippery Scale?

Or Perhaps the Work of Stephen King?

Or Perhaps the Work of Stephen King?

This is what happens when you
“Do Poems All Day;”
You come up with Snappy Titles
Which say Your Poem in a different way,
Often removing its jumpy taste
And baking a Better Poem in the end.
THEN, The Poem Mix upon which I depend
Ends up Baking a Better Poem in the end,
And once a Better Poem Mix is found,
And A Better Poem is made,
THIS will be The New Poem Mix
I will choice to bake.

Regarding Sources of Poetic Inspiration

This could literally save lives! People Everywhere who have cried Too Much Salt in Too Many Tears won’t be forced to Blindly Search for a “Quick Fix” or a “Fast Replace” with Notorious Vexter, Visine.

At least not Anymore, they won’t.

[I told you folks SHE did it all day;
It keeps me awake and
Gives ME a Terrible Headache!

Apologies, Metaphor Her Friends, & More:

THE DEDICATION

THE DEDICATION:
Metaphor is The Meta
I’ve Literally Spent
MY ENTIRE LIFE
Searching Phor;
It was a Quest I was
Glad to undertake
On behalf of Poetry’s sake.

THE TITLE:

MY GRAND TRIBUTE TO METAPHOR
THROUGH THE SIMILE OF
Apologies, Metaphor, & So Much More
(Not than anyone’s ever apologized to me before….).

THE PREFACE AND SYNOPSIS
(Longer than The Execution]

An Indirectly Literal AND
Disproportionate Piece of My
Metaphoric (hypothetic?)
Forgiveness
(I Refuse to grant the Literal kind,
Since I’ve Never been Guilty of Nothing);


But if your Words
Of Sorrow are stale,
No Slice of the Whole
Can stuff Me or THEM
Full of the Stuff of Life!

Hopefully you won’t be overly-startled by my Oxymorons,
Bored by my Clichés,
Nor find my Allegories too obtuse to

Disgrace you and deface you,
Stimulate and Titillate you
Until you Crescendo With
An Overflow of Innuendo
At the Highest Of
All Heights
Ever Achieved
In Your Entire Life.

So why not stick around?
We may go to Ground,
But we can certainly
GIVE IT A Try, and
GIVE IT A Fly,
So, Let’s apply!
It’s a job I can do;
Can You?

THE EXECUTION:

FIRST:
It takes an Adult to apologize,
So you’re already taller than I imagined.

NEXT:
We’re all guilty of limiting our
Fields of vision
To better scope sizes and shapes
In this shadowy cipher of space.

LASTLY:
Please don’t rain on
Anyone Else’s Parade,
Especially mine.
Not today.

And regarding your forecast?
Are you willing to remain at least
Partially Sunny?
I’ll taste you some sweet
If you’ll shine me some sunny.

In fact, if you’ll spare me
A “brief interlude of rain”.
I’ll let you call me “Mama,” sonny.

THE COGNAC:
How was it for you?
Frankly, it was
Way too much like work
To work much like on me.

The Modern-Day Poet

Most certainly not doing It in the car!

THE MODERN-DAY POET

She must talk to herself
ALL of the time,
And by her Own iPhone,
She must have been driven blind.

She ALLSO must ALLWAYS speak in Rhyme
(I know, I can’t stomach it Myself most of the time),
And A More Creative Method of Spelling
NO one should Never happen upon and find.

If that’s all set up,
Then “The Words Said By She”
Can NOW, Automatically,
Travel nonstop and
Highly-Targeted-Directly
From Word-to-Text
And Bot-to-Blog,
Then Blog-to-‘Gram
And back again,
To once again
Wordplay with Those
Who Jest The Best❣️

And please don’t breathe a
Word of This to Anyone,
But she could do “It Driving”

If IT wasn’t so dangerous!

Three-4-One

Dear Businesses I have Patronized Regularly:

If I hear Another Person Yelling me
They’re “Bringing me Something-for-Free,”
While charging a Monthly Subscription Fee,
And subjecting me to
[Frequent], [[Repeated]]
!Constant Endorsements!,
I shall SCREAM
And Promise To Flee;
Conduct My Business
Somewhere Else.

MY ONLY THREAT?
Bare Finania££y.
MY IMPACT? Nano-Minu$-0ne.
But Most Mucho-Micros I Know In Person,
At least on The Individual’s Basis,
Are the Kind of Folks who are SO MUCHO,
They Mucho ALL Their Micro Group-Impact into A MACROECONOMIC One;
So Please Remember and Forget Me Not.

Signed,
A Merry Band of Nobody
Who won’t Remind You of Her Age,
Just her Loyal Patronage.